Update in Life

*Sighs*

Nothing really goes really well in college , eh?

At least , as far as how i see it in Andrew . He is still coping with the workload and the lifestyle of it . Of course , its only March and the pressure may not be as high as it is ..

Still ..

The fact remains ..

He cannot survive it alone .

He may try to hang in there . Doing things alone . Trying to handle the oversized problems that greatly overweighs him .

He will fail .

But of course , it will be a problem if my partner decides to croak . There is much for him .. for us to do . Currently , the only problem i see in college is the homework . Not problems in quantity but he faces a problem in the quality of the work .

College .. is different from school . In school , the examples are clear . The examples can lead you straight to the answer and only deviates a bit . In college , the level is incomparable to the school's homework . They do give you examples , but the examples will never lead you straight on .

Intellect does that .

You would have to think differently . Think outside the box . Think logically with the right amount of common sense .

Which Andrew lacks .

He lacks common sense . His basis of thinking is that of theory . His thoughts fail to redirect themselves if he encounters a problem in which the answer is not as it seems .

But whatever he lacks , i cover .

Thats the reason for my existence .

The only vision in my life . The mission i entrust upon myself .

HD

KL Car VS Singapore Car

Singaporean no match for the rest

The Johor MSA mini , the first of the 4 MSA mini tournaments , ended in a blast on the 22^nd of March . Held a week after the Lim Boon Heng Cup in Singapore , a total number of 12 participants were present for this event . The somewhat diminished number of participants did not prevent the event from being a very exciting one .

In the intermediate category , 4 players from the English College of Johor , famously known for producing skilled Scrabble players such as Ching San Song , Ian Tay and Brian Lim , slugged it out in a 6 match challenge with Benjamin Choo emerging as the champion while Haren Mohanraj was the runner-up . Each of the intermediate players won some cash for their participation in the tournament .

The focus , however , was in the Masters category where 5 Malaysians and 3 Singaporeans battle it out for first place . The Malaysians ; veterans Tan Jin Chor and Jocelyn Lor , recent CNY champ Alex Tan as well as up and coming youth players Ramaraj Sundraraj and Chang Ching Wei were all able players and were a on par with the Singaporeans who came ; Ricky Purnomo , Tony Sim and Shim Yen Nee . All the Malaysians hailed from Kuala Lumpur , making this tourney a KL car vs Singapore car match . This was due to the fact that all the Malaysians went back in the same car while the Singaporeans came and went back in another car . After a grueling 15 games , Ricky Purnomo of Singapore managed to brush aside the other players to win the tournament with an eye-popping 13 wins and +1104 spread . Ricky only dropped two games in the first day , losing to fellow Singaporean Tony Sim and Malaysia’s Chang Ching Wei .

The 15 games were played in two round robins and a KOTH final pair-up . This was a good format as it enabled each player to play with every participant twice , giving them the pleasure of exacting revenge or just to enjoy another game with one another . On the first day , 10 games were played so that the players would be able to return home earlier on the next day . Ricky Purnomo dropped two games on the first day but still ended up on first place after the first day . He was closely followed by Tony Sim and Tan Jin Chor , each on 6 wins . It was a bad day for Chang Ching Wei as he only won two out of the ten games played ( winning against Ricky and Ramaraj ) despite putting up a creditable display in the CNY tournament a mere month ago .

The second day saw mixed fortunes for the players . Ricky Purnomo , still on his excellent form , produced a superb performance to win the last 5 games . Tan Jin Chor , who was just behind Ricky , dropped 3 games but still managed to hold on for second place . It was the battle for third place that was exciting . Tony Sim was clearly on his way to clinch the place as long as he did not lose to Jocelyn by more than 163 points in the last game . Alas , it was an unlucky game as he stumbled to a 188 points lose to Jocelyn , ultimately giving Jocelyn the third place . A post mortem on the game showed that he could have lost by less had he played a lesser point move to go out in two rather than being caught with tiles himself .

Chang Ching Wei , sore from his dismal performance on the first day stringed four wins in a row to pit himself against Alex Tan in the KOTH round . It was as though history repeated itself . Chang Ching Wei opted not to challenge Alex Tan’s move of ABYED [ phoney] but instead challenged ILKA , a valid word , resulting in his lose by six points . Even his 107 point move of VERIFIED did not help to earn his fifth win in a row . On another table , Ramaraj , having lost all his games before the 15^th game , played a niner DISASTER but it was not enough to prevent the disaster of losing to Yen Nee . Other notable plays were ZOOGLEA , DIOCESAN , PYRANOSE , QUASARS , AMEERATES and FORAMINAL .

For his efforts , Ricky Purnomo pocketed RM 300 while Jin Chor and Jocelyn each took home RM200 and RM100 respectively . All in all , a good job by the organizer , Othman Zakaria in making the Johor MSA Mini an exciting tournament . The next tournament in the Malaysian schedule will be the MSA Mini 2 , held in Berjaya Times Square . For further inquiries , you can contact K.Sundraraj at 012-3661555 .

The Result

I trudged to the front , my face impassive as the teacher passed my result slip to me . My heart was beating furiously . There were more than enough butterflies in my stomach to last me for an eternity . Out of the corner of my eye , i glimpsed the many anxious faces , the many happy and sad faces alike . Lastly , i spotted HD outside the hall , giving me the support i need . I looked at my result slip .

BM - A

BI - A+

Sejarah - A+

Mathematics - A+

Moral - A+

Additional Mathematics - A+

Prinsip Perakaunan - A+

Physics - A

Chemistry - A+

Biology - A

EST - A+

My heart skipped a beat . I looked at the results again . A sense of euphoria was erupting in me . I yelled with joy as i clutched the slip to my chest as though it meant the world to me . Friends all around me were congratulating me . Their voices seem a bit distant . Finally , i went outside to where HD was .

He smiled as he looked at the results . " Good job ," he said ," Better than expected , don't you think ? " I could only grin as we shook hands . " This is all thanks to you , man , " I said " I wouldn't have been able to do it if you weren't there . " HD waved the thanks away . " All i did was gave you some suggestions , that's all . It was you yourself who made it happen ," he said . I acknowledged his words as i went back to the hall . " The next one to overcome would be the A-Levels examinations ," I said " You with me? " . HD laughed as he walked away .

" Where else can i obtain as much fun as this ? Count me in . " he said before vanishing into the crowd . I smiled as i walked back into the hall . The world seemed lighter as though the pressure had miraculously disappeared . The results has been obtained . I have done my best . But the work has no end .

There will be others .

But on this faithful day of 11 March 2010 , let's just forgo that work and have fun ..

CCW

The Coming ..

" It's finally here , huh ? " HD said as he walked towards me . I nodded my head in acknowledgement as i stared at the night sky . " It's finally here, " I muttered " The time when the path of my life will be carved in stone , when dreams become reality , where I will be standing in between the forked paths , finally deciding on the path which i would want to take . "

" All of this , on a single paper , " HD smirked , " Three years ago , i would be indifferent to this . Now , i understand the emotion in what you humans know as anxiety . Your hands are shaking , your perspiration gradually increases , the heart beats faster , you wait in anticipation . All of this , for a slip of paper . " I smiled as he delivered that statement . " Obviously , you who never feels anxious , knows nothing about that particular emotion . " I said . HD laughed . " Even so , " his tone picking a more serious tone " What would you do if you did not achieve what you want to achieve ? " I looked sideways at him and was surprised to see a serious face . " Hmph , whatever comes , comes . And i will take whatever is in store for me . " I said .

HD clasped my left shoulder with his hand . " As long as you can handle it , then i have nothing to worry about . Just remember , your suffering is mine too . If you feel that you can't hold it back , you know what to do . " I nodded as he turned to walk away . " Remember, Andrew , " HD turned back as he said " You don't judge a person by the strength he shows , you judge him by the amount of strength in which he can handle . " He walked away and i stared at him until the night darkness totally engulfs him .

I sighed as i continued my empty gaze . Time to set things straight , once .. and for all .

Can i do it ?

Am i ready ?

Do i believe ?

Yes .

CCW

Home

I sat in front of one of the many computers in the library , slowly finishing my assignment and proceeding to finish the rest of my homework . I took a glimpse at my watch on my left wrist . The watch showed 5.00 p.m .

" Another one and a half hours , huh ? " I murmured . My transport is only available at 6.30 so i had almost two hours more before going back . I sighed and continued my work , finishing it within half an hours time . I laid back on the chair and gazed at my surroundings . I see people typing out their assignments in the computers , i see people surfing the net . I see people reading books . At last , my eyes fell on HD who appeared beside me .

" Not going back yet ? " he asked . I shook my head . " Transport's coming in an hour's time , " I said . HD nodded . " Pity about this , huh ? " he said , " I'll be around for awhile . This college intrigues me since its my first time entering the compound . You mind ? " I nodded my head . " The college is yours to view . And in regards to your first sentence , no , it isn't much of a pity , really . "

" I just don't wanna go home so early ."

HD looked at me , a frown on his face . " Problems? " he asked , " Nothing big , i hope ? " . I shook my head . " Nothing much . Its just that i hate going home and having to listen to all the grumbling and mumbling that they dish out . " HD smiled . " It's part of living in this world , ya know ? " He turned serious . " You gotta know that even if you are tolerant enough , other people aren't . " I turned to the computer screen and sighed . " Yea , I know .. "

" You might have given away your anger , your impatience and your sloth . But , remember , other people don't share the same things as you . " HD said , " Bear that in mind . And carry it well . " I nodded . " Thanks ."

HD nodded . " Don't worry too much about it . I'm here to help , as i have always been . If things get too nasty for you , you know what you need to do . " He grinned that trademark wicked grin he has . I laughed briefly , the joy which never reached the cold , calm eyes that i have gotten used to having .

HD started walking away . " You are one of the roots to that tree you strive so hard to keep intact . Don't topple it down now . I still wanna see it . " He walked out of the library , leaving me with much to think about .

CCW

The Bearer of His Nature

Everyone feels pain . Everyone feels guilt . Everyone feels the emotions that GOD has provided us . Happiness , joy , pain , guilt , suffering , avarice , wrath , lust , envy , jealousy , sloth , pride , gluttony , despair , hope , vainglory . So many more . Everyone in this world feels each and every one of them in their veins . In their blood .

Not me .

I chose to omit the several emotions that i have in me . I vowed never to let all the emotions engulf me and make me into a monster . I vowed to bear them all , by sealing a part of them in a being i created . That being will bear my sins . That being will know all my sins . That being will be my sin .

He is the other part of me which few have seen . He is the part that lays within me , that takes the negative forces , leaving me with only the positive . Unless , i chose not to part with the negative force in question . I gave him my anger , my sloth , my gluttony , my envy , my jealousy , my pain , my guilt . Most of all , i gave him my greed . I chose to retain my despair with me . I thought that having despair reminds me that i am still human . That an angry beast can't stay chained forever . I kept my sins in this being i created . Each sin i present to him comes with a cost . Each pain and suffering that he receives results in a repayment in despair .

I kept my pride , knowing that i am no one without it . I kept my happiness , just to go on with the day . I kept my instincts , because there are times when you need them . I kept my hope , because i longed for a change . Finally , i kept my wrath , in order to unleash the deadly sins i kept in my other being .

" I am the pain of his wounds, the stress in his veins, the suffering of his plight,and his rage in his heart"

" I am the shadow that lives in the place of light . I am the light in the darkness . I am the bearer of his deadly nature ."

CCW