I never liked anger. I never liked the fact that the human nature will change the moment anger takes control. Controllable? Yes. Uncontrollable? Even more so. The redness that has always signify anger glows ever so brightly in humans. Frustration. Rage. And if one time is not enough, humans are capable of going berserk for more times than we can imagine.
I resent that.
My resentment does not come from fact that i am angry but more to the sense of regret. I regret the fact that anger brings out the worst in a person. I regret the fact that there are many factors in our surroundings that are capable of catalyzing anger. I regret the fact that anger has caused meaningless deaths.
I regret knowing anger.
I decided that i must eliminate anger from my system. It is not much to the world but it means a lot to me. And so, here i stand in front of my anger with the aim of preventing its control over me.
The first battle begins.
Anger.
Anger stood in front of me. From a normal person's view, they would suspect nothing from his calm face and relaxed posture. However, closer observation shows otherwise. Anger is not only by outlook. One who has enough experience will be able to conceal one's outlook of anger. But not the eyes. The eyes are the only giveaway that a person is angry. The dead, serious eyes that hold no emotion other than anger itself. Eyes that pierce you, showering its target with resent and despise.
Anger.
Anger heaved a sigh as I stood in front of him. "Somehow," he said,"I knew it was only time before you decided to face me." His voice had a touch of resentment as though he had not yet accomplish what he had wanted done. I faced him with determination in my eyes. Determination to see this through. To clarify matters. To settle what needs settling.
"Don't be mistaken, my friend." I paused, composing my mind to find the right words.
"I do not intend to destroy your existence.I do not intend to completely remove you from my existence. All I want is concealment. I want restrain. I have seen what happens when you are set loose. I do not wish to walk that path again."
Anger relaxed his clenched fists. The eyes which had only anger slowly gained something else. Comprehension. Anger had understood me a little. However, this was far from over. The first step has been executed. Time to master anger.
Anger turned its back on me to gaze at the red-orange tinge of the setting sun.
"Anger," he said,"comes whether you like it or not. If it is not frustration, it is indignation. If it is not incurred wrath, it is annoyance. You are right. You cannot destroy me. It is not whether you want to, its that you simply CAN'T. You do not remove anger. You do not dispel wrath completely. You merely restrain it." I nodded.
"But," Anger turned to face me, " What makes you think that you can control me?"
" What sense of pride has clouded you so much that you think you can restrain me?"
"Can you truly deny the rage of your soul? Can you always be the patient person you are known to be? I doubt you can. Sooner or later,you will let me consume you. I have been your wrath all these years. I know what can happen. And yet, you say that you have the strength to deny me. If you do have it, show me." Anger stood in front of me, his form radiating unbearable heat. The ground gave the sense of engulfing flames. This was Anger's ground. Rage. Anger. Frustration. Wrath.
I turned my gaze from Anger to the sky. Even the sky exhibited reddish colours from the flames that now licked the earth. The iridescence of the sky in Anger's world. I smiled and looked at Anger.
"I don't have that strength." Anger's look was incredulous as i said that.
"Like you said, I can't keep you tethered strong enough to prevent you from coming out. Because of that, I make sure that I can rely on someone whenever i feel that i cannot control you."
"And that is why, i'm here." Another voice joined the fray as HD joined us. "I will be the extra restrain that will keep you in check, Anger." Anger looked at HD and laughed.
"I knew something was up but this was against what i had expected. This should be exciting. Very well, Andrew. I'll see just how much you can keep me controlled. Remember your own saying. A chained beast only gets more violent upon its release. As my master, i am obliged to wish you all the best." Anger turned around." But do not forget, there will be times when you need me. Do not hesitate. Do not fall back. Only go on. The flames that are in your soul will be forever be there, never extinguished, ever blazing."
"I will remember that," I replied. Anger smiled.
"The rest are not so easygoing as me. You will need to be more prepared when you face the others. My brothers," he sneered,"some of them are not to my liking."
Anger vanished as he spoke his final sentence. The flames which were burning the ground opened a path forward.
The first battle has ended.
As i left Anger's world, i reflected on what has happened.
Anger is in us, whether we like it or not. Everything,however, ends up with choices. Humans themselves would have to choose and decide. The pieces are already there. What matters is the move that one makes.
For now, The One Who Rages has been mastered.
CCW
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