Aftermath of the exams ..

Ah , bliss .. beyond the abyss.. i'm being crappy now ...

On the plus side , 80/80 for ADD MATHS !! woot !!..

HD

Faced With A Dilemma ..

Yet again , i find myself face to face with implications that seem so simple to accomplish but of which i cannot be able to understand properly ... And yet again , i become an idiot to myself , to other people ... And yet again , i'm the cause of stupid things happening ..

Because of that , i can't do anything right now ...
Too tired of even writing anything else ..

Will be using a lot on the computer for this week .. Next week , hardcore studying ...

HD

CNY Money ;P

Woot .. money!! and angpaus!!

Finally , i have decided to make a count on the angpau money that i have collected this year .. Its suffice for one like me .. about RM280 .. Gonna deposit this in my bank account together with an extra RM 20 .. Would have about 4k++ in my bank account ..

And damn .. my account online has been blocked ... maximum amount of password tries achieved.. =.= .. keep forgetting the password .. simple combination really and i had to forget it ...

Back to school tomorrow .. loads to do ..

HD

Back to normal.. or is it?

Something has been taken from deep inside of me ,
A secret i've kept locked away no one can ever see ,
Wounds so deep they never show , they never go away ,
Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they play .

Just listening to 'Easier To Run' by Linkin Park ... I'm sorta emo rite now .. adding a new style to the way i talk .. a more calmed way of talking .. don't feel like swearing anymore ..

Anyway , the monthly exams just passed .. Bm was crappy .. didnt use two of the isi that they gave .. lolz .. nazri's so gonna kill me .. Bi was normal .. Est normal .. Moral .. normal .. Add maths .. got one prob .. Bio .. okaylo ... Chemistry .. abit prob on Salts .. Physics .. eff it .. M.Maths .. okay lo... wait.. 2 questions = 20 marks ? Holy @#^%$ .. Sejarah .. let's not talk about it shall we?

A little something i wrote during maths .. I'm quitting the rap scene for awhile .. need to work up my mouth stamina first .. lolZ.

Some part of me , just doesn't wanna believe ,
What they see through me , it's all just a deceit ,
Somewhere in me , looking out from me ,
Taking in the view , the mistakes i made ,
Never thought that one day it's back to square one ,
Never believed that there are things i've not done ,
But now it's gone , wasted , vanished in a flash ,
Emptied , nothing , burned right down to ash ,
I keep losing my ground , i keep backing down ,
I don't step up and try turning things around ,
It's a collision of thoughts , that's why i'm confused ,
But , it's a confusion of sorts , thats why i don't refuse ,
Someday . oneday , i will know what keeps me going ,
Next day , no way , i will just keep moving ,
Up to it , to give it one final shot ,
Going to the top whether i fail or not ...

HD

Updates ..

First of all , a very belated Valentine's Day to all of you out there ! Hope it ain't that late ..
Next a very happy birthday to Ramaraj and Amirah !!

Finally , its the monthly tests .. Chemistry , Moral and Bm tomorrow .. Hope i can do well ...
Planning to anyway...

HD

Freaking torment ...

On the outside , i'm just a normal guy you see on the streets ... A nice house with parents that strive to give the best .. A nice home to study and do my things .. of course , thats what the people around me are deceived into witnessing .. what they don't know is too ghastly too explain ..

Its a living HELL in my house .. A yelling woman with a PMS rate of once every 5 seconds , an over-over-over-protective man with those stupid remonstrations of someone lacking proper manners , i think i have said enough .. On the front , i keep my cool ... But inside , i'm broken .. There's an angry self that i keep shackled , able to surface any moment .. Why do you think i'm such a thoroughly patient guy at some times ? Because i have to discipline myself to endure those madness in the house ..

I try clearing out of house every oppoturnity i get .. It's not that they are that unreasonable , the point is , when they explode , they cause an earthquake of a 10 ritcher scale and volcanoes and tornadoes providing back-up ammos ...

I'm sorry to those who know her .. Knowing that they would never know her true self ... I'm a fucktard .. I don't have the guts to tell the whole world ..

I'm just releasing all my anger in this post so that the next dose of it will be taken with patience .. Luckily , i have other things to keep in mind .. A monster to shackle , but my tolerance is waning .. sooner or later , there will be crime .. and guess who will be the victim ? The alternative is simple , yet , i know enough not to let myself go along that path .. Suicide's a stupid thing to do .. i'll endure if i must , suffer if it is for the sake of a moment's peace , and pay for my mistakes if i must .. but yet , one thing holds true .. and it will remain as always until they see sense ..


I am the Lost Soul ..

Hard times lay ahead ....

Indeed ...

The truth cannot be any clearer .. i , the Lost Soul , have just been through hell these few days .. What with the ending of the chess MSSD .. i got 5.5 out of 8 .. nothing to be proud of ... should have gotten 7.5 ...

ANYWAYS , my mum was waxing lyrical on how stupid i was .. haihZ .. Really , this post is of no mere importance .. i'm merely writing this to give away time ..

HD